The Morning After The Fight Before

And so it came to pass… blah, blah, blah… Audrey Harrison lost… again!

Eating gloves was always part of Audley’s pre-fight game plan so this was working perfectly!

The pre-fight quotes –

“Fortunately, there are enough people in Britain who want to see him get destroyed, completely annihilated. That’s why this fight is happening. They want me to close the curtain on the joke that is the Audley Harrison show.”David ‘Hayemaker’ Haye

“I’m no shining violet.” Audley ‘A-Force’ Harrison

Hayemaker: “What were you doing when you were 18?” A-Force: “I was running the streets, taking money off people like you.”

“I’m just a better athlete – I bet I could run faster and jump higher than you.”Hayemaker

A-Force: “I’ve sparred many rounds with you and I’ve never tasted that right hand you claim you have.”Hayemaker: “That’s because you were too busy cowering in the corner.” (see photo above)

“We’re going to contact the British Boxing Board of Control and request that Audley be allowed to use an axe in the ring on 13 November. What good is an axe if you’re too scared to throw it?”Hayemaker

“I can’t call myself the greatest but I can say this is the greatest comeback story in British sport, bar none.” A-Force

“Audley is a one-dimensional fighter who is going to get a three-dimensional beating and will be dreaming in 3D by the time I’ve finished with him.” Hayemaker

“His ego’s out of control. Part of the beast that is David Haye, I created it. He idolised me.” A-Force

“When I came out of the Olympics they called me Muhammad Ali, then four years later I’m ‘Fraudley’. But after this fight I’ll be extraordinary.” A-Force

And my personal favourite – “I’m going to give him a beating in love, a beating in love and compassion.” A-Force

THE END

“I wouldn’t accept that I froze at all, it was a bit cat and mouse earlier on, but he’s a counter puncher and so am I, it was always going to be like that. I definitely didn’t freeze, I’m not a gung-ho kind of fighter, I set traps for people and I had him dancing to my tune.” A-Force

And The Winner Is… Don King!

Here’s looking at you kid…

So the reporter asks Don if he would work with David Haye should he win. King replies “absolutely, how long? Not Long! If he should be able to capture lightning in a jug?! If he should be able to perform that miracle… but I’d like to bring Nicolay back for a rematch cos something’s gotta be wrong? Maybe he had an off night!” Pure genius from the greatest rapper of all time in my humble opinion!

Haye is smaller than even Don King nevermind Valuev!

King goes on to add “however, I think the chances of that happening are slim and none – and slim’s outta town. So David, you know I love you but It’s all over!” “How Long? Not Long!”

Watch the Don King interview below.

David Haye vs Goliath

Rock’em Sock’em Robots

Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots is/was a two-player game/toy designed by Marvin Glass and Associates and released by Marx toys in 1964 . Marx later was acquired by Tyco Toys, which was acquired in 1997 by Mattel, Inc. It is currently marketed by Mattel.

Each player takes control of either the red robot (the “Red Rocker”) or the blue robot (the “Blue Bomber”), both of which are standing on a platform reminiscent of a boxing ring. By pushing buttons on a pair of joysticks at the base of the platform, players make their robot punch at their opponent’s robot. If a robot’s head gets hit with the sufficient force at a suitable angle, its head will pop up, signifying that the other player has won.

Which brings me on to that chesire cat of a man David Haye – the fake smile is infuriating! After chasing the Ukrainian, Wladimir Klitschko for what seemed an eternity he finally got his match rubber-stamped only to pull out with a ‘sore’ back  on June 3rd – 2 weeks before the scheduled fight! Haye who is known for his trash-talk and flash-smile wasted little time in securing the truly monsterous Russian, Nikolay Valuev to help shut his oversized mouth! Valuev stands 7 feet 2 inches tall and weighs 23 stone, dwarfing the cocksure Haye by some 12 inches! Haye who’s nickname is the Haymaker had this to say of his opponent, “He is the ugliest thing I have ever seen. I have watched Lord of the Rings and films with strange looking people, but for a human being to look like he does is pretty shocking.” I say, Whateva…

David vs Goliath

I’ve got to admit I’d like to see David Haye get his head knocked off but stranger things have happened and he might just end up being crowned world champion on November 7th. Get in to the spirit of things by searching out some Rock em’, Sock em’ robots…

Why? Because I bloody-well said so!